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I used to like this little life

2024-04-01 Change of state

you used to dance in the rain at dawn

finding solace in each and every droplet trying to befriend you, each flash of lightning keeping you safe

people would not understand, and it's alright, you were rather relieved to not be the one

having to keep a distance

from those who'd say you weren't human enough

for them

the lost souls never judged anyway, and they always happened in your way, anyway

but the clouds have cleared up

your once roses and rainbows now overtaken by a scorching sun sucking away at your days

and it's left you feeling nothing but defeated

and withered

and frail

and it feels like nothing you do can undo it anymore

when all you wanted to do was see the world evolve for as long as time itself survives

and you with it

but how would you see any of it when

your very eyelids now weigh as much as the planet you used to stand on, and you're no goddess

that others used to take you for

yet still demand just as much of you

thought being noncorporeal would make life easy

not once stopping to ask how to live without a body

how much a ball of energy can use up before disappearing in its entirety

but of course they never took you seriously, and why would now be any different anyway?

Celestial bodies

2019-04-13

In the system of the wildly spinning Gamma Cassiopeiae, in an eccentric orbit that luckily matches the brightness fluctuations of the star, there lie two dwarf planets orbiting each other. One, a barren world populated only by highly active rocks rolling down mountains almost taller than the planet itself, constantly raising just to fall back on themselves. The other, a smaller tomb world, dead flat, dead shaded, dead frozen, dead drifting, lifelessly carried by her companion, thrown around space, never touched while the other one collects or slingshots away any debris they stumble upon. A quiet, unhindered world, entirely dead, yet reassuringly peaceful.

Here, on this somber rock, two creatures were dragging their mushy limbs across the dusty surface, muttering incoherently to each other as if they had just traveled several dozen light years in an instant. What they were unaware of is that, in fact, they had just traveled precisely five hundred and forty seven and a half light years over the course of a thousand seventy three years, a hundred and ninety three days, ten hours and forty eight minutes, placing their journey at an average speed of a hundred and fifty two thousand eight hundred and ninety four point one five four kilometers per second. Except they didn’t, they barely gained a little orbital velocity and haven’t aged a femtosecond, which is exactly why they were so utterly confused. Well, one of them was. The other one was more concerned about having a terrible headache and not feeling his insides in the right place.